Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Needs vs. Neediness

"Don't ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go and do that. Because what the world needs are people who have come alive."
-Harold Whitman

No one wants to appear needy, yet everyone has needs. Needs are present in all of us and are not an indication of weakness. We need food, shelter and clothing; we need to eat and sleep; and we need relationships and love. Having our needs met determines the level of happiness and success in our lives. It is important to take a close look at yourself and decide what makes you come alive.

Needs are best met by taking responsibility for our own life and actions. It is important to be proactive and assertive. Met needs will result in fulfillment, happiness and success. Having your needs met tends to attract others to you.

In contrast is neediness. Neediness is unquenchable and tends to be like an empty sieve--always needing more. Neediness comes from desperation and helplessness. Neediness is driven by emotional deficits. Neediness always externalizes problems and solutions. Repelling others is a result of neediness.

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